How Can I Find Out If My BF Is Cheating: Do’s and Don’ts

We're putting together an editorial staff that reflects our broad audience and their various financial circumstances. We value and encourage the experiences and perspectives that help us connect with our readers, answer their questions, and win their trust. Please read our disclosure for more information.
Updated on July 14, 2023 by
How Can I Find Out If My BF Is Cheating: Do's and Don'ts is advertiser-supported: we may earn compensation from the products and offers mentioned in this article. However, any expressed opinions are our own and aren't influenced by compensation. The contents of the website, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on this site (“Content”) are for informational purposes only. The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional financial or legal advice. Always seek the advice of your Financial Advisor, CPA and Lawyer with any questions you may have regarding your situation. Never disregard professional advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website!

Are you feeling concerned that your partner may be cheating? Unfortunately, suspicion and paranoia can start to take over if we don’t receive clear signals from our partners. We know it can be challenging to differentiate between real signs and mere coincidence. When those worries become too much, it could cast a dark cloud over an unhealthy relationship.

Before jumping to conclusions, here is how you can find out if your BF is genuinely faithful or unfaithful – without resorting to cruel tactics that could irrevocably damage the trust between you. Read on for dos and don’ts on uncovering infidelity in relationships!

7 Signs Your Partner Is Cheating On You

Before you take any action, it is important to start by looking for the signs of cheating. Cheaters are often careless about covering their tracks, so if you’re aware of what to look out for, it can help put your mind at ease – or confirm that something is happening behind your back. Here are a few red flags to pay attention to and ways to find out if your boyfriend is cheating:

A veil of secrecy

When a partner suddenly becomes more private, especially regarding digital devices like phones or laptops, it may signal they have something to hide. If you’re wondering, “how can i tell what my husband is looking at on his phone?” keep in mind that an unusual increase in phone usage or over-protectiveness of his phone might be a sign.

Alterations in communication

A noticeable shift in how often or how a partner communicates can be a sign. This could manifest as increased silence, excessive chatting, or even a change in their usual conversational style.

Appearance transformation

Partners may change their physical appearance dramatically, such as adopting a new workout routine or updating their wardrobe, when involved in an affair.

Unaccounted time

Frequent disappearances or periods that the partner cannot or does not explain satisfactorily might indicate infidelity.

Emotional withdrawal

A partner who seems distant, uninterested, or less emotionally available than usual could suggest cheating.

Heightened defensiveness

An unusual level of defensiveness or hostility in response to simple questions about their activities may hint at a partner’s infidelity.

Unexpected gifts

Receiving regular gifts without any special occasion might be a partner’s way of assuaging guilt associated with cheating.

Remember, these are just potential signs. They might also indicate other issues in your partner’s life or relationship. It’s always best to communicate openly about your concerns.

DO’s to Uncover Infidelity in Relationships

The following are some steps you can take to help uncover infidelity in relationships without risking further damage:

  • Acknowledge your feelings and express them with empathy. Before taking any action, listen to your intuition and examine if the suspicions warrant a conversation.
  • Have an open and honest conversation with your partner. Speak calmly and assertively without pointing fingers or accusing them of anything specific. Instead, focus on asking questions about their behavior, such as why they are suddenly so distant, in a non-confrontational manner.
  • Don’t jump to conclusions! It is important to trust yourself and pay attention to any unusual behavior but keep an open mind and examine all possibilities before you accuse your partner of infidelity.
  • Don’t immediately resort to snooping, spying on your partner, and tracking someone’s texts. If you feel it is necessary, assess the implications first. Not only can this lead to major trust issues in the relationship, but it could also land you in legal trouble.
  • Seek professional help, if necessary. These conversations can be hard to navigate without the guidance of a third party, such as an experienced counselor or mediator.

DON’Ts to Uncover Infidelity in Relationships

Here are some things you should avoid doing while attempting to uncover infidelity in relationships:

  • Don’t confront your partner in a hostile or aggressive way. Accusations and blame won’t help the situation and could make matters worse.
  • Don’t be tempted to track your partner like a private investigator! Even if you have valid concerns, it is essential to remember that no one likes feeling policed.
  • Avoid trying to use technology to catch them out. While it may be tempting, this could breach your partner’s privacy.
  • Don’t let fear consume you or drive decisions. If something is wrong, take the time to assess the situation and make sure emotions don’t get in the way of making a rational decision.

Using these do’s and don’ts can help you uncover the truth without causing unnecessary damage to your relationship. However, if cheating occurs, the only way for a healthy relationship to continue is with genuine trust and honest communication. If you cannot trust your partner again, it may be time to move on – regardless of the outcome.


Finding out if your partner is cheating can be difficult. It’s essential to take the time to observe any changes in behavior, communicate openly with your partner, and look for professional help when needed. We hope these tips have shed some light on how you can find out if your BF is cheating – without resorting to extreme measures that could cause further harm to the relationship.

(Visited 29 times, 1 visits today)

🏔 Read Next 🏔

Best Side Hustles of 2023

The 27 highest paying side hustles you can start today.

View article ➞

The Common Cents Mom Newsletter

Join thousands of curious consumers getting the inside scoop.